How to Fix Your Sex Life: AZ Challenge Reflections from Tina at Life Is Good

           Not only did Tina at Life Is Good provide a fun Reflections post, she probably added some search engine optimization clout with her title.  Thanks Tina!  By the way, Tina along with Shannon at The Warrior Muse valiantly kept up the memory of the April Challenge through the summer as they organized their own Post Challenge Challenge where they invited A-to-Z-ers to join them in visiting all of the April Challenge blogs.  They were a couple of Challenge heroes for sure. 

How to Fix Your Sex Life: AZ Challenge Reflections

I'm so blessed to have found the AZ Challenge through my bloggy-buddy Rayna at Coffee Rings Everywhere. This challenge, as I told you in my A ~ A New Beginning post, came at a pivotal point in my writing. And as I promised in my V ~ Very post, I'll now give you the full scoop of why participating in this challenge was, for me at least, like trying to fix your sex life.

Ah, I see I have your attention!  As my dear, faithful readers know, I'm a walking, talking, medical worst-case scenario. If health insurance was priced like car insurance, I'd be paying the just-got-out-of-juvie-drive-a-red-sports car-not-so-spectacular-grades-but-would-you-please-insure-me-anyway rate. I go to a lot of doctor's appointments. (Just try my nifty search gadget in the side-bar and type “doctor” to get more stories.)

So I'm in a waiting room, forgot my book, and am therefore paging through, oh, probably Family Circle or Good Housekeeping or some other such magazine. In this issue, the regular marriage counseling  article is about long-married couples trying to recapture the spark in their sex life. There were three case studies. Yes, you get to hear them all because strangely enough, I think that each of these solutions can be applied to struggling writers. 

One couple decided that they'd take turns initiating sex. To writers, this translates as, “You give me a prompt, we'll both write something. Then next time, I'll give the prompt, and again, we both have to participate.” You still with me?

Another couple decided that they would only make-out. For a week. Then they'd see what happened after that week of, ahem, restraint. Writers: If I start to feel the beginning of a slowly smoldering fire,  I'll have to wait to write.  Until next week.  Anticipation makes everything sweeter.  No fair scribbling notes on napkins or jotting down ideas in your notes app. You have to WAIT to write.  Waiting makes the want grow fonder.

The last couple solved their, um, issues, with the equivalent of the AZ Challenge. Sex every 24 hours, come hell or high water or up the creek without a paddle. Once. Every 24 hours. If some unforeseen complication prevented this, then they had to do it twice in another 24 hour period. I probably don't need to translate this one...because...

That last scenario is what happened to me in this challenge. I hadn't foreseen it, but like what I read in the article, knowing that I had to put SOMETHING up every day just kinda freed my brain and my inhibitions. I was thinking, “Well OK, it just has to be something. It doesn't have to be perfect. It doesn't have to be long.” Some days all I managed was just a quick couple of observations, but then on other days, I was in the mood for a longer story. Some days I wrote about something I'd already written about. One day, I had no time time to write at all. To complete the challenge, I wrote two posts on the last day. I'll leave the translation from writing to sex up to you on this one :-)

Big thanks to my 27 new followers. I am honored. Also thanks to all who stopped by and left their footprints. My intent was to visit all of you in return, but if I missed you, please let me know. I really do want to meet you. As for the flip-side, I'm now following 23 more blogs, and I'm looking forward to continuing to build more inspiring bloggy relationships. I had a blast doing this, and hope our faithful and seemingly tireless hosts are willing to do it again. I knew I couldn't homeschool, write a post each day, and get to each of the 1282 bloggers participating during this event. It's like Santa.  Not really realistic.  But as long as the linky is alive, I will keep going until I hit 1282. I'm just too damn stubborn, not to mention competitive, to back down now.

This post was prompted by our challenge sponsors.  They asked all of us  to reflect on this month of writing, and then link up back at Tossing It Out, our host blog.  AND, last but not least...I got the groovy badge over there in the sidebar for completing the challenge.  Go me!  (I'm such a dork...)

A Favorite Blogger Speaks: Reflections from Alex J. Cavanaugh

A to Z Challenge Reflections...

Lee at Tossing It Out has asked us to do a reflection post regarding the A to Z Challenge. 

And Elizabeth Mueller made this really cool award badge for those who survived. Thanks, Elizabeth! 

I was amazed at the variety of posts for each letter. You guys were really creative! I was also surprised by the variety of blogs participating, many of which had nothing to do with writing. Thanks again to Lee for asking me to be one of the co-hosts!

I just have two things I want to say about the Challenge. 

Last year, there were only one hundred of us. We were able to visit everyone and it felt more intimate. I made some really awesome friends as well.

This year, visiting every blog was almost impossible. (This Ninja failed!) And in trying to do so, I realized it was more difficult to foster friendships. I’m sure a lot of people lost steam after the first week or so. Those using the special widget started at the beginning, although I think many switched to the ‘surprise me’ feature. I think a lot of blogs were overlooked.

Hart had an excellent suggestion, one I think we should adopt for next year. We start with the blog immediately following ours on the list. We go as far as we can, and if that’s only one hundred blogs, that’s fine. But that way, everyone receives visitors and no one feels overwhelmed.

Last year, my goal was to survive the month and gain some new followers. I made it to the end and almost tripled my following.

This year, I didn’t worry about gaining a ton of new followers. Yes, I could’ve followed everyone I visited and gained a ton of new followers. But that wasn’t my goal. I wanted to be a good co-host and spend the Challenge featuring my current blogger buddies. This community is so awesome and I wanted to give back.

As a side note, if you are following me but I’m not following you, please leave a comment! The Google Friends Connect sometimes doesn’t link a blog to your icon, but if you leave a comment, I can find your profile – and your blog to follow!

You guys are awesome and I hope everyone had a blast. It was really cool to hear how many were enjoying the Challenge and meeting new bloggers. That made it all worthwhile - to know there were bloggers in the same position that I was last year reaping the benefits. That is who this Challenge is for, and what keeps it fresh. Let’s make the 2012 Challenge even better!

         Thank you Alex!  Alex went all out the past two Challenges and played a huge role in the success of both.  Hope you follow his lead and become a part of the Blogging from A to Z April Challenge in 2012.  Be sure to tell him thank you.

         The Challenge sign ups will begin on January 30th, 2012.

Sue Travers Entered Two Blogs in the 2011 Challenge and Survived to Tell About It

       Yes, that's right!  Sue entered Traverselife and jumping aground and finished with both of them.  Quite a feat for this busy lady.  I'll let her tell you about her A to Z adventure.  

A-Z Blogging Challenge. Reflections

What a journey, what a month.

Firstly a humungous thankyou to Arlee at Tossing it Out and crew for hosting. It's been a massive job for you all, and I appreciate the time and energy that you've all put into this event. Congratulations, well done!

What I've learnt:
Don't tackle two blogs in the A-Z Blogging challenge without preparation! It wasn't the smartest thing I've ever done. It was utterly exhausting, demanding, draining and I'd never recommend it - ever - to anyone who has an ounce of common sense.

I decided on March 31st to enter my second blog. That's plain crazy!
One? No worries.
Drabbles? Fine.
Two? Insane!

The alliterative Drabbles were fun to write over at jumpingaground , although I found it hard to turn off once I got on a roll. All stories are based on real people and events except Yolanda and her yellow yacht. Many are environment or climate related, others are to do with learning difficulties.

I suspect the idea for bullying may have been floating around in my head, lurking, just waiting for an opportunity like this. The structure worked for me. I think if I'd been left to my own devices I wouldn't have attempted it at all or I would have drifted and dithered, with a bit here and a bit there. A-Z provided the scaffolding I needed to do it in one hit.

The list of A-Z Workplace Bullying posts is here.

I had no idea how long each post would take. I spent 1/2 day getting a vague outline together to make sure I would have something for each letter, realised I had something sort of workable, and plunged in. I hadn't anticipated each post would then take many many hours, revising, rewording, checking for accuracy, editing and adding pictures. Some are a bit long, but that's the way they are.

I'm tenacious. This is not good if you're being bullied. It would be possible to hang on and try to make something work when it's destined not to. But for a blogging challenge it's invaluable!

I'll try to remember never to post a comment when I've had a glass or two of wine. It's not good. Now you know why some of those comments were, erm not so clearly written. 

It would have been difficult to have completed the posts without the support and input from other bloggers. Each and every comment helped me get through. This topic isn't fun or popular or sexy - to read or to write. 

Why tackle workplace bullying?  I hope it might be a resource beyond this challenge. I'm horrified at the prevalence of ongoing bullying in workplaces. As a Career Development Professional, my clients tell me what happens in supposedly reputable organisations. The people I work with are honest, ethical, have strong morals and act with integrity. Too many workplaces don't value those attributes, they chew up employees, take everything they can get, then spit out what's left. I felt this was a small something I could do to support others and perhaps shed some light on this appalling behaviour.

Knowledge is power. My aim was to share my knowledge in a hopefully easy to read form to empower others.

What I've learnt about others. People are generous. Of course I knew that, but it's been underlined hugely. People have supported me by encouraging others to read the information, they've forwarded the posts on and have commented in a very positive way. That's what I dreamed might happen, thanks to everyone who has shared and commented.

What have I learnt about blogging?
Success is just a word. Running the two blogs in tandem was fascinating. jumpingaground went from something like 22 followers to 83, but I don't get many drop in visitors or many hits. Keyword search data is wishy washy at best.  But it's fun, and it's for me!

In comparison, traverselife went from about 22 followers to 52, which in comparison is 'unsuccessful'. Keyword searches however, show clearly what people are looking for, and I get significantly more hits daily but less or no comments. I've had quiet, consistent, steady support for the posts from people within and outside the blogging community. That's rewarding. People who've contacted me have given me a huge boost, It really makes this feel like a strong community pulling together, and is a reassuring feeling of connectedness. Thank you.

East Side Gallery. Berlin. 2009.

For me, the month wasn't fun, but it supported my core values and it has been rewarding doing something I truly believe in. I've done the best I can given that it was unplanned and in a sense done on the fly to conform to the challenge guidelines. I'm pleased with the result, and proud I stuck with it. I wouldn't post like that again for a whole month. It took too much out of me. I need a break.

What do I look for in other blogs?
Meatiness, fun, not self indulgent, interesting, challenging without being derogatory or rude.

What next? 
I might do a follow up with something about schools and bullying, add some more links to some good information. Editing needs to happen....drat..... I want to pose the question "Do you bully yourself?" and look at how we're often meaner to ourselves than is healthy. I'm looking forward to eventually writing about the healing process after being bullied. Looking at how we can create rich, full and meaningful lives is something I've wanted to post about, but haven't yet found a structure that feels right. I also want to revisit assertiveness and How to say "No".

Would I recommend this challenge to others? Definitely!

I've just had some insight when I was making a comment on someone else's blog. I went in to this Challenge asking myself what I could GIVE to others. I wasn't focusing on how many followers or comments I could GET.  Hmmm.....

Lastly, I have a newfound respect for everyone who has written a book. How do you do it and stay sane? Characters who wander off and create mayhem, plots that refuse to co-operate - gosh you guys are impressive!

       If Sue was able to keep two blogs running in the Blogging from A to Z April Challenge surely you can manage one.   Watch for the sign up list coming at the end of January.

Related articles

• Workplace Bullying is a significant challenge even if the reality is smaller than expected (safetyatworkblog.com)
• What to Do When The Workplace Bully is Your Boss (socyberty.com)
• What can be done about a workplace bully? (career-advice.monster.co.uk)
• Show Your Support! (a-to-zchallenge.com)